After seeing the blinder-wearing, simplistic, dogmatic, vitriol of the attendees at the NRA Paranoia Jamboree in Houston (and its glaring lack of racial diversity), I now agree with the speakers at the convention, such as:
Governor Rick “Prayer, Guns, and um…um… oops” Perry
Senator Ted “Filibuster and Lie about an imaginary Gun Registry” Cruz
Senator John “Poison Pill” Cornyn
Attorney General Greg “Keep your guns, come to Texas” Abbott
Representative Steve “If Babies Had Guns They Wouldn’t Be Aborted/Win an AR-15!” Stockman
Texas Representative Steve “What’s the Supremacy Clause?” Toth
Governor Sarah “Helicopter Hunter” Palin
Ted “Messy Pants” Nugent
Wayne “Tyranny, Confiscation, Tyranny, Confiscation” LaPierre
Senator Rick “The Bill of Rights came from God” Santorum
and Glenn “Am I Still Relevant?” Beck.
When these Pavlov-inspired “leaders” have the ability to distill a solution to all of society’s ills down to a bumper sticker (“The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun”) and have it swallowed whole by their one-note flock who hug the Bible in one hand and an AR-15 in the other, who can somehow justify loving God and can, with a clear conscience, kill His creatures, who cloak their racism as patriotism and assemble arsenals to defend themselves against the America they profess to love, who consider “victory” to be any time the “fake” black president loses and, of whom 44% consider the possibility of an armed rebellion against the government likely in the next few years, yes, maybe we should give them what they want. Let them secede. Concern over the porosity of our border and a demand for an impenetrable fence begins to sound good. In fact, we should insist that the fence continue around the entire Texas perimeter and commit every gun manufacturer and gun owner in the other 49 states to live in this newly minted country we’ll call Gunistan. God bless Gunistan. Lock and Load.
While the rest of the country is trying to curtail the carnage caused by a society drowning in firearms, the Texas legislature recently passed 12 bills weakening Texas gun laws. So take your guns, hug them tight, tuck them in at night under your pillow and the rest of us will leave you alone. Please do us the courtesy of doing the same. No longer will you fear Texas turning blue. It will forever be, blood-red.